I am just getting back from meeting some friends at the Ritz Carlton for coffee and I was reminded of a weakness…I hate asking for help. Every time I open my mouth to ask for help this gag reflex comes over me giving the illusion that I am about to throw up yesterday’s PB&J. I first realized that asking for help was an issue of mine when I began hanging around people much more successful than I. I when they got stuck or anticipated a problem that they did not know how to solve they began thinking of people whom could help them overcome their obstacle.
Pride Attack
I asked one CEO what was his secret to success he replied your success is in direct proportion to your ability to ask for help. Wow! Wanting to be at his level of success I thought to myself whenever I get stuck I am going to ask for help. Did I? Well, I started to but then the request got stuck somewhere in the mid throat area. You see when I went to ask for help, I was admitting 2 things: I did not have the answer and secondly, I was deficient. Mr. StevenRoddy.com not know something? That is like saying Chuck Norris is not a tough guy. That simply can’t be! Pride is a silly thing.
However, in the several months since my first battle with pride I have successfully been able to ask for help without the words getting caught in my throat. I will admit that I still get a churning in my stomach but once the words begin to come out, they fly out.
Benefits of Asking for Help
So what does this mean and how does asking for help make you more successful? When you ask for help you are identifying three things:
- A Problem – You identify a problem in your business, idea, staff or revenue. You think to yourself, “I need more sales” or “I need to manage my time better.”
- A Problem Solver – You then ask yourself, “Who can help me solve this problem?” In other words, “Who is not experiencing a lack in business,” or “Who is living a well-balanced life?”
- The Solution – Lastly, when you ask he or she what’s their secret (i.e. you are asking for help) then you two can come up with a solution to your problem.
Over the past couple of months I have learned that if I ask for help, people are willing to help me. If I do not ask for help they do not know that I have a problem and even though they care for me and may have the answers, giving me a solution never even crosses their mind because they do not know that I am in need.
What do you need help with? What is the one problem that if you had the answer would set you on the path to success? Once found, ask someone to help you with the solution. Do not ask them to become your mentor, for that is like asking a girl whom you just met to be your girlfriend. Then when you get the answer, do something with it! The biggest slap in the face is if an individual takes the time to connect with you, gives you the keys to success and then you do nothing with the information. The next time you come around he or she will be less likely to lend a helping hand.
3-Step Challenge
My 3-step challenge: Identify your problem, ask for the help of a knowing individual, then do what he or she says to do.
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I enjoyed your article and I love your graphics!
I like the point you made about identifying the problem. I think this is the major reason that most people do not enjoy success. They simply don’t take the time to think about what is going wrong but simply just keep making the same mistake over and over.
Thanks for the thought and I will check back often.
Hi Steveroddy.com I read your ¨help I´m unsuccessful¨ article and I found it very interesting. This article helped me out, I am used to asking for help, and sometimes I don´t do anything with it, I hold on to the information but thats where it stops sometimes. I don´t have a problem with asking for help and I´ve noticed that a lot of poor and low income individuals do the same, they ask for help a little to much. So before I read this article I was expecting something totally different. I think its good to ask for help but not to much, because then one can become depending on others to solve problems for them. Your three step advise is great i espesially like that last one ¨do¨ or action. Love your website steve. keep up the great work!!!!!!!!
You are right. Anything in excess is bad. Life is like a road with the extremes being the ditches to the left and the right of the street. Living in balance is the way to peace and success.